I Want To Be A Wife But Not A Bride!

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TO HAVE AND TO HOLD FROM THIS DAY FORWARD FOR BETTER AND FOR WORSE, FOR RICHER AND FOR POORER, IN SICKNESS AND IN HEALTH, TIL DEATH US DO PART.

I would be delighted to take these vows with my handsome fiance. We are already living together, have a child together, are raising our children together and are very much in love and committed to each other. To be lawfully married to him, have his name and wear his ring would be the icing on the cake.

To be a BRIDE… my worst nightmare!

Apparently it’s every little girls dream, princess dresses and dancing the night away with your Prince charming at your fairy tale wedding with all your family and friends. No chance, everyone looking at you, judging you and expecting you to float and glow.

It has become competitive. The price of the venue, number of guests and all the trimmings almost measures your popularity.

I was married before. We had two children together and decided that was what we should do next, yes we loved each other and believed we would spend the rest of our life together, but neither could we afford or did we want a huge fuss. We planned the wedding and got married within 8 weeks. Our decisions were made simple because it all revolved around availability and cost.

Ceremony – Registry Office
Venue – Cheap and available
Dress – Friend owned a bridal shop, so first dress I tried on done the job
Suits – My then fiance worked for a suit company and got discount
Guests- 15 close family/friends. Other family members, friends and colleagues in the evening
Band – My dad’s cousin
Cars – Friend of a friend
Flowers – Friend of a friend
Photographer – Cheap and available
Cake – Gift from a friend
Vows – what ever we were told to say
First dance – can’t remember (whatever he played)

All with no significance. Needless to say we are now divorced and have both moved on and are very happy with our new partners.

There’s is nothing that would make me more happy than to be the wife of my now partner. (See previous blog “Childhood Sweethearts” http://wp.me/p5SbY9-C) We have been together for almost 5 years now and have proven our commitment to eachother. Marriage would be a perfect next step, neither of us are getting any younger.

Due to me being in my current emotional state there is no way on this earth I could contemplate being a BRIDE anytime soon. (See previous bog “Removal Of The Black Box” http://wp.me/p5SbY9-F)

I could not possibly make any of these decisions… I don’t know what I like, what suits me, my favourite colour, car, venue, church, song…

The list for a wedding is never ending.

The only things I am certain of is that I love him with all my heart <3. The only important people I would like there are our gorgeous children and immediate families. It could be in a field wearing wellies for all I care past that!

So in the meantime, until I find myself, my likes and dislikes and my character we will stay co-habiting and… when we do get round to tieing the knot it will be our special day. We will remember every detail of it because we will strive to make it ours! Hopefully by then I will have the personal confidence to float about and enjoy! X

Don’t go buying a hat just yet!!

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